Day 188 ~ Tangled Webs

July 7, 2014

My Instead: I confronted my daughter-in-law about fibbing and stroking me six years ago. 

Recently, our family had photos taken because my son Todd and his wife Kyra were in town. We do this every five years, so it was now or never. Now, it’s a month later and the photos are ready to be viewed. My daughter-in-law Shaundra, along with my two grand kids Abbey and Andy, met me at the photographer’s studio to check out the pictures. Some of the photos were great and some not so great. Unfortunately, most of the ones that I would want as my choices were among the no-so-great. The culprit was the sun and too much of it. I could kick myself for not speaking up at the time because I knew that this would happen.  

Anyway, Shaundra and I created our own groupings from the “okay” photos and paid the deposit. We had decided to get the “package deal” instead of “a la carte”. The package was more expensive, but it included bigger photos and fancier choices for the photo material. When we left, we decided to get some dinner with the kids, even though the clock struck 8:30.  

Fazzoli’s had a sparse crowd at that time of the evening. Shaundra and I had a lot to discuss about the photo viewing. We were kicking ourselves for agreeing to the higher-priced package, feeling that we had been intimidated and somewhat demeaned. Ears had to be burning back at the studio.  

After our meal, we loaded the kids into her car…our mouths were still a going! Somehow we got on the subject of lying, fibbing and sucking up. I have some pretty strict opinions about the truth and when there’s a lack there of. Shaundra admitted that she sometimes gives up the fight and fibs to keep peace.  

I remembered once when she had fibbed to me. I had never told her that I knew that she did. Time for me to fess up! “Instead” of my never saying anything (for all these six plus years), I proceeded to tell her about the time I took a goody bag up to the hospital a few hours before Shaundra and my son Kyle arrived to give birth to Abbey. Shaundra was supposed to be induced at midnight. She had repeatedly told me that they had “ripped” into the goody bag during her hospital stay and that it was great. Unfortunately, I had seen the bag at their house when they brought Abbey home, and it looked pretty much undisturbed. Did she lie to me to stroke me?  

Shaundra totally objected! She said it was the truth! She went on and on about the seasoned almonds that were in the bag and that she thinks of me every time she sees them in the store. Well, I know what I saw…and she believes what she did. And that’s okay. 

Shaundra and I have a great (and mostly honest) relationship because we choose to make it that way. It’s called mutual respect and, yes, love. And because of this, I never need to be “stroked”. And that’s the truth!