Day 31 ~ Won't You Be My Neighbor?

Day 31

Jan 31, 2014

My first:  I helped my neighbor put away her outside Christmas electrical supplies.

I had just gotten home from work and running several errands. I was tired from working/painting until 11 the night before and I had just given blood earlier that day too. I had been thinking on my drive home of what my “first” would be for the day. I had a lot to do to finish my bedroom renovation and really didn’t have much time to give to a “first”.  I saw my neighbor clearing out her front yard of stakes, cords, spotlights, etc from her outdoor Christmas display. I thought that I could help her and make that my “first” for the day!  I REALLY did not want to…BUT I yelled across the street to JoAnne and asked if she needed help. She said I could if I wanted to. I said I would change and be right out. I went out and helped her finish up and even picked up some large limbs in her yard and put them in a pile in the side yard.

She was asking me how my renovation was going and I invited her in to see the progress. She was very impressed with it all and couldn't believe how fast the project was going. We had a nice little visit sharing what’s been happening with both of us. I am so glad that my “firsts” got me to do this. Sometimes taking the time for someone, even when you’re tired, can rejuvenate you in more ways than one…

Day 30 ~ Mums the Curse Word

Day 30

Jan 30, 2014

My first: I did not curse the whole day…except that one time.

After failing miserably the day before at trying not to curse, I decided to try it again today. I even solicited God’s help by saying a prayer for guidance before I got out of bed.

Today’s endeavor was much easier than yesterday’s at maintaining a clean mouth. My daughter-in-law and my grandson visited me in the morning to see the progress of my bedroom renovation. Of course, I did pretty well…after all, there was a small child present! My daughter stopped by in the afternoon for a peak at the room as well. I made it through that visit with a clean slate. I was keenly aware that I had to keep it clean. I slipped one time when I was alone. I don’t remember what caused my profanity, but it must have been a pretty petty stimulus because the word that slipped was NOT even the F-bomb. I’ve been known to expel that one now and again.

The funny thing about this is that I think I’m going to keep on trying to break this habit of sounding like Ms Tough Guy. I just have to find other ways to blow off steam…

Day 29 ~ Pay As You Go

Day 29

Jan 29, 2014

My first: I paid for the lunch of the person behind me at Taco Bell.

I went to Taco Bell to pay for the lunch of the person behind me in the drive-through at Taco Bell. I really didn't want anything for myself, but I was going to order something so it wouldn't look so obvious and premeditated. Of all things, the order taker machine was not coming on and no one was speaking to me to take my order. I waited and waited and was saying hello, hello. Still no one spoke. I told the lady that was behind me that the machine was not working and that I was going to go up to the window.

When I arrived at the window, I told the manager that was running it at the time that the order taker machine was not working. He checked out a few things and finally realized that it was turned off by mistake. He politely asked me what I wanted. I proceeded to tell him that I really didn’t want anything, but just wished to pay for the woman’s order that was behind me. I handed him a 10 dollar bill and said that I trusted him to do this for me. He assured me (word of God and everything) that he would do as I asked.

I left feeling a little bit disenchanted about my kind gesture because of the hassle with the order taker machine. But to counteract that feeling, I started thinking of what could possibly happen in that woman’s life. Maybe she was having a hassle-filled day and this “gift” was just the ticket to get her back on the loving track! I will probably never know, but I can still dream of the goodness that could grow from a simple 10 dollar bill.

As a side note, I started out my day thinking that I would go the whole day without cursing. Oh well…not so easy! I’ll have to do that one over some other day and say a morning prayer to God to help me with this one. I didn't realize how much of a habit I have here when things don’t go my way. Imagine that!

Day 28 ~ "Assisted Living"

Day 28 ~ "Assisted Living"

Jan 28, 2014

My first: My grandson and I went to an assisted living facility and visited with a random couple.

Andy, my grandson, and I went to "The Atrium", an assisted living facility, to visit the elderly just at random! A nice couple sat down with us and chatted for quite a while. There were other residents that came up to say “Hi” and see the little guy. Andy was a little shy, but was slowly becoming brave enough to move a little closer to all these strangers.

Several people thought that we were there to see someone we know that lives there. I said no, we were just there to visit with all of them. They were pleasantly surprised and so was I.

I acknowledged to some of them that I realized the day would come that I would take their place, so to speak. And they laughingly said that they probably wouldn't be there anymore when that happens. It was a very nice time, not just talking with new people, but recognizing the generational differences of us all. The wonderful thing is that we were all the same in this moment…living life.  

Day 27 ~ No Closet Case Here!

Day 27

Jan 27, 2014

My first: I “came out” to my Aunt Betty.

I worked for my Aunt Betty today like I have for about the past 4 years. She was nice enough to buy a pizza and share it with me and also her daughter Sue. We enjoyed a nice lunch as I told them what I was doing this year, a “first” everyday!  Sue thought that sounded difficult to think of something new to do for 365 days. I told both of them that I welcomed any and all suggestions. My Aunt Betty was really getting into it and was coming up with all kinds of ideas.

At some point during the time I was there, I made the BOLD decision to “come out” to my Aunt Betty as my “first” for the day. I knew that she knew, but we had never discussed it. Her brother, my Uncle Denny, told me in 1997 that he knew and I figured he had to have found out from her.

Anyway, after she had paid me and I was about ready to leave, I told her that I had thought of a “first” to do today! She was curious as to what it was. I said that I had something to tell her, but that she already knew about it since 1997. She couldn't figure out what I was going to say. Well, I did it! I think she was kind of feeling awkward about it, yet was acting like it was no big deal to her what my orientation was (or anyone else’s for that matter). It was really nice because she was so accepting and loving and almost proud of herself (as she should be) because she was so open-minded and non-judgmental.

After about a ½ hour discussion, I was heading for the door and THEN came the questions! She was curious about the lifestyle and I told her as much as I knew. I teased her about all the questions she was asking!

Eventually, I left and Aunt Betty and I are just a little bit closer…

Day 26 ~ Join the Ranks

Day 26

Jan 26, 2014

My first: I watched porn on XTUBE… just to check it out, of course.

Well, I finally joined the ranks of "THE PORN WATCHERS". Not to say that I have never watched porn before…I am not a total goody-goody. I've been to a few parties where this was the entertainment on hand. But I have NEVER watched it alone in the comfort of my own home. It was quite a different experience…kind of like you’re being naughty and Mom will NEVER find out.

I was becoming a little uneasy…I guess in a good way and was going to continue elsewhere instead of the middle of my living room. Unfortunately, my laptop shut down…again. Was that a sign? Anyway, it was late at night and I figured I could pursue this at another time when sleep wasn't more important.   

And that’s all you’re going to get out of me on this subject, folks! I definitely don’t want my blog turning into “erblotica”.     

Day 25 ~ Androgynous Strain

Day 25

Jan 25, 2014

My first:  I dressed up in a tux shirt, a bow tie, and a black coat and scarf.

My friend Pam was turning 50 and, of course, there was a party! I decided to dress up in my tux shirt (a leftover from my old singing telegram days), a bow tie, and a black coat and scarf...kind of the dapper look. I have NEVER gone in public dressed so much like, well, like a dude! Not that I am the most feminine of dressers, but this was way out of my comfort zone.

As I was getting ready, I was rehearsing in my mind all the clever and funny things I would say to anyone who would comment (or listen) at the party. I was READY! But...then the strangest thing happened. As I was getting closer to the party site, I started to feel a bit anxious, wondering "what will people think".  There goes my mother again...she keeps "showing up" and she's not even PRESENT. (That, of course, is not strange, but a common occurrence in my life.) Anyway, after the anxiety subsided a bit, I forced myself into thinking "Hey, this is my life and these are my moments!" I will not take away from Pam's moment, but I will definitely live mine!

Day 24 ~ Discount the Discount

Day 24

Jan 24, 2014 

My first: I refused to take the 6% discount from my carpet company.

I went to my carpet company to make my final selection for the carpet in my new bedroom and to make the payment.  The owner offered me $2 off per square yard. I told him that I did not want to accept the discount. He got the deal from his supplier, so I said he should get the discount.

Well, what ensued was a bit out of the ordinary. He had the ticket all made out and he was not ready to be an “Indian giver”. He said he offered it to me and that is it. The unfortunate thing here is that his granddaughter’s father was killed earlier that day in a car/train accident. He was in a hurry to leave to be with his granddaughter and did not want to take the time to make up another ticket. Of course, I understood completely and told him how sorry I was.  I was a bit disappointed that my offer was refused, but he said I could make it up to him with my next carpet purchase. I said I didn’t know when that would be and he said “Aw…you’re always doing something to your house”. I said “Ok, it’s a deal!

This was really an awkward interaction because I was SO willing to tell him about my story of doing “firsts” everyday. How stupid! This guy wanted to console his granddaughter during this horrific event and all I could do was think of me and my story. Thank God I “woke” up and realized that it is NOT all about me. (See previous blog “I Owe You”). This “first” was of no significance compared to what was happening to this man and his family. Sometimes, you just have to shut the hell up, Mary!

Day 23 ~ I Owe You

Day 23

Jan 23, 2014

My first: I "tried" not to say "I"…or at least not talk about ME.

I started out this day with every intention of not saying “I”. Not so easy! I spoke with the electrician working at my house about the “5 Love Languages” book and I said that I had read it. Other than that, I let him do the talkin’ and it was interesting how much he was sharing with me. He was a very good man…married, children, and church-goin’ too.  And I did this amazing thing…I listened!

At my job that day, I let my client do the talking and only said “I” when it was unavoidable. I spoke with my friend Kelly and almost sounded evasive trying not to say “I”. I told her “Let’s talk about you”. She thought I was hiding something from her and I reminded her of my “first” for the day.

Later on I spoke with my friend Cindy. I hadn't talked with her for quite awhile. She shared her recent car accident experience and we also talked about her job, its long drive and her prospect for a new job in 2015. I shared nothing about me: my “firsts”, my blogs, not drinking in 2014, my room renovation…nothing.

That evening I went to Home Depot to get supplies for my renovation. Well, by that time, I realized that I would have to say “I” so that I could convey what I needed to the various associates.

All in all, it was interesting not talking about me. I realized that conversations are best when both parties share information with neither one dominating or, worse yet, taking too long on their soap box. Again, it is all about balance. 

Day 22 ~ Meet and Greet and Connect

Day 22

Jan 22, 2014

My first: I greeted my plumbers that will do my bathroom plumbing and told them the story of my renovation.

I was heading out to go to my job and saw the plumbers getting out of their vans to head in to my house to do my rough-in plumbing. I went over to meet each of them and tell them the story of why they were hired to do this job.

This is a first for me because, normally, I would not have gone over and met these guys. I would have just waved, said that I was the owner, and then left for work. BUT, on this day, I decided to go on over and meet each of them and tell them about the renovation being my endeavor to "live" in my living space and quit using it as storage space for my stuff. I also talked about my age and said that "it was about time". I left them a little happier, I think, and ready for work...oh, and I guess I was happier too!

The amazing thing is that when I returned (and it was their quitting time), we talked like we were long time friends. I felt that we had a connection because I was open with them about my intentions and ultimately about me...I was more than just a customer. I was their friend...

About a week later, two of the plumbers came back to do the finish plumbing. I was there to greet them and make pleasant conversation. As they were leaving, they told me they wished all their customers were as nice as I was. Unfortunately, some of them are NOT. Their comment made me feel sad for their having to put up with people's bad moods.  However, I felt warm inside, thankful that I was the bright side of their day!

Day 21 ~ This Wall Won't Be Talkin'

Day 21

Jan 21, 2014 

My first: I sledge hammered my bedroom wall.

Why can’t I have my own little "ground breaking" ceremony? Tearing down walls in my home to make way for a more comfortable and open living space is not something I do every day.  I’m in the process of turning two bedrooms into one big master suite with a master bath and a walk-in closet. So let’s get goin’!

First – Grab sledge hammer.

Second – Start swinging!

Third – This wall won’t be talkin’ anymore.

I knew that this was a "first" and probably a "once in a life time" opportunity to make Swiss cheese out of my wall. You could say that I was taking out my frustrations on my wall, but I have none. Life is good!  Did I just make that up or have I heard that somewhere before? Hmmm...

Day 20 ~ Before the After

Day 20

Jan 20, 2014 

My first: I invited three neighbors into my house to see the "before" of my master suite renovation.

I was busy taking down my Christmas lights outside when three of my neighbors were gathering in front of my house looking at the free stuff I put out in my front yard for the taking. I took this opportunity to ask them to come in and see the "before" of my master suite renovation. Normally, I would not do this. I have asked my neighbor, Rosemary, in before because I have that kind of relationship with her. To ask a group in to see something and then go on and on about what is going to be done is a bit “out of the box” from my normal “good neighbor” behavior. I'm usually the "Hi, how ya doin'?" type and then I go on with my work at hand. I don't want to be that person so much anymore...life is too short. 

Day 19 ~ From Topless to Bottom

Day 19

Jan 19, 2014

My first: I ran topless down to the bottom of the slope in my backyard and had photos taken of me doing it.

 I was running out of ideas of what to do as my first today. I had had my son's birthday dinner earlier and was very busy with all that. So, late in the evening, what else is there to do but run around in your backyard topless…and it's 32 degrees outside!

I was just hoping the neighbors were busy inside watching their TVs…anything but looking out their windows at my crazy antics! My friend Kelly was here to witness and take pictures.  I chose this “activity” because ALL my life I have been so modest…and that is not a bad thing, mind you. But, you know what, sometimes ya just gotta let go...once in a while anyway.  I ran all the way down to my neighbor's fence and back on up the hill. Kelly was there with camera in hand to take pictures. The hardest thing was to get her to focus the camera on some kind of light so the camera could do its thing…geez!

Funny thing is, I didn't really think this was so crazy…at least not for me. Who knows what other people would think, especially if they saw. It’s just living and not standing on the sidelines...done that enough. Haven’t we all?

Day 18 ~ Damsels in Distress

Day 18

Jan 18, 2014 

My first:  I went to the aid of my friend and her girls at a moment’s notice

Damsels in distress? Just call me! My friend Cami was with her girlfriend’s daughters when the truck would not start in Target's parking lot. She texted me to see if I could help them out.  Even though it was really not convenient for me (I had so much going on that day preparing for my upcoming master suite renovation), I hopped in the car and went to her aid.

On the way to Target, I remember feeling utter joy knowing that I could be there for somebody in their time of need.  I had never been called by a friend to help out right then and there. It was nice dropping everything I was doing just to be there...now they just have to pay it forward!

Day 17 ~ Dry Waterin' Hole

Day 17

Jan 17, 2014 

My first:  I went to my neighborhood bar and did not drink alcohol

Tonight I went to Club Escapades to show that I can enter a bar, hang out, and not drink. I talked with the owners Rick and Harold. And, yes, I did not drink alcohol, just cranberry juice. I was there for about 45 minutes and I found myself quite talkative because I was explaining everything I was up to this year with “not drinking” and “doing firsts” everyday. It looks like this visit covered both of my challenges. The guys liked hearing about it and wished me luck. They explained how alcohol affected them negatively, sometimes up to 3 days later.

The next day I found myself thinking about what I want in this life and one of them is a person that will love and appreciate me for me. I feel that the universe may flow my way this time because I am discovering and liking who I am without the cover-up of alcohol.

Day 16 ~ Free of Charge

Day 16

Jan 16, 2014 

My first:  I cleaned Nadine’s house free of charge

Today I cleaned a house for one of my more disabled clients, Nadine. When I was just about done, she pulled out her checkbook. I immediately grabbed it and put it back where it was. I told her that today’s cleaning was free of charge! She said why and I told her that this is my “first” for the day. I had explained to her earlier that I was doing something new every day this year. She started to argue with me, but I told her that I was more stubborn than she was. She was very surprised and appreciative. Jokingly, I told her that I do “firsts” but not “seconds”…just so she knew that next time she would be charged. She laughed. As I was leaving, she said she felt much better than she felt before I got there. She was kind of having a “crabby” day until I got there. Her mood didn’t change so much because of the “discount”, but because we had such a nice chat while I was working. Again, time well spent with my friend, Nadine.

Day 15 ~ Vegan Voyage

Day 15

Jan 15, 2014

My first: I had a strictly vegan day.

My diet today consisted of apples, blueberries, broccoli, and pecans. All I drank was some coffee in the morning and water the rest of the day. I was working at a house in Millstadt that had a candy dish filled with loose M & Ms. I grabbed a handful of them and almost tossed them in my mouth. Luckily, I remembered my vegan challenge right before the dreaded binge. Whew! Other than that little episode, it was pretty easy. Drinking water helped with the oral fixation that most of us have. I could do this again and I may just do that!

I spoke with a prospective client, Mary, today “for the first time”. We visited for quite a while and it was totally delightful. I even told her about my “firsts” that I am doing every day. She thought it was a wonderful idea because I was creating memories. Right before I left, I fixed a lamp for her that she had had for a long time. She was so happy and thankful...like I just raised Lazarus from the dead. Hopefully, I will start working for her and we can share more “intimate” times like these…you know, the no technology connection. 

Day 14 ~ Chucky Cheese Choice

Day 14

Jan 14, 2014 

My first: I went to Chucky Cheese with Andy (all by ourselves) for the first time

My grandson Andy and I visited Chucky Cheese this afternoon. Yes, of course, I have been there before! I've had kids and I have older grandchildren. But this was my time, my first time, with my little Andy. He was very familiar with the place and knew what he wanted to do. He definitely liked basketball!  

It was nice just being with him and not being pulled in all directions…however, there were a few activities that I got wrapped up in (the kid in me), but had to remind myself that I had a 22 month old to chase after. He was not afraid to interact with other kids, but he did not like the merry-go round. His other favorite was the squirt gun water target.

Day 13 ~ Graveside Seat

Day 13

Jan 13, 2014 

My first: I visited my dad’s grave on a blanket under a full moon

After I finished my day’s work, I went to the cemetery after dark with a full moon to light the way to my dad’s grave. I laid a genuine Native American-made blanket on the grave and lay down. Of course, I took some photos of me and “my dad”. Then I just lay there looking up at the stars and the moon thinking about time spent with my dad. The closest I’ve ever felt to him was when I was caring for him during his last days. It was a joyful yet sometimes emotional time those last two weeks. I loved taking care of him and doing for him (and Mom) what needed to be done.  

I thought of my childhood and remembered when he would call me into the living room to take off his shoes. Tonight, I wished that I would have been “in the moment” back then and relished those times...talked with him more. I was such a stubborn kid and bound and determined that I would like Mom best! Dad got second fiddle where I was concerned. He and I missed out on so much during those years because, I guess, we were both sticking to our own agenda: never make the first move to connect.

Well, better late than never. Dad and I had a special moment tonight and God’s presence topped it all off. The funny thing is I was not spooked at all…not at all. It almost felt like I had done this before somehow. Maybe Dad’s “embrace” was my comfort…

Day 12 ~ Tag, You're It

Day 12

Jan 12, 2014 

My firsts: First driving lesson with Isaac, my grandson

   Laser tag with my 2 grandsons and my friend Kelly

This afternoon I picked up Isaac, my “bonus” grandson from his first Driver’s Ed class. Bravely, I asked him if he wanted to drive my car to our next destination. He said he didn't have a permit and I said we would just be driving on the side streets. He accepted my offer and actually did pretty well even while feeling his share of insecurity and apprehension.  

Isaac drove us to The Edge in Belleville to do our little laser tag adventure. Tyler, my grandson, has done it (he estimated) about 25 times in his life! He and Isaac are pros and were more than willing to help Kelly and me with our virgin attempt. We received a few pointers and some dos and don’ts from one of the laser tag employees and then we were off to the vesting room! We donned our laser vests, grabbing the one that matched the number on our ticket. After that we entered a massively-large room filled with peaks and valleys, walls and windows, black lights and glowing colors. Since it was my first time, I was trying to figure things out and wondered why my “gun” was disabled so often. I didn't realize that I was being targeted and “shot” without my even being aware. I got smart as the 20-minute clock ticked away and decided the best thing to do was to take cover…and TAKE AIM. My ranking immediately improved and went from 35 to 31 by the time the game was over. I will definitely do it again now that I am so much the wiser about what makes one a more worthy competitor.

I remember thinking I have got to get into! It’s my “first” for the day! “Kid-dom”, here I come! At the start, it was kind of confusing. I lost my fellow teammates in this maze of confusion, but once in a while I found them and commiserated about the equipment or our various defeats. By the end of the event, I was feeling “in the moment” with what was expected in this oh-so-new realm of techno-fun! Look out, fellow “laserers”! The next time I won’t be so easy on you! By the way, Tyler came in 4^th place…show off! Go, Tyler! 

Day 11 ~ Cozy Convo

Day 11

Jan 11, 2014 

My first: I shared an afternoon talking with my niece Amy, great-nephew Christian and Mom

I went to my mom's to take down her Christmas tree. My niece and great Nephew Christian were there and helped with the job at hand. After all was down and put away, we ended up spending the rest of the afternoon TALKING! Amy was very forthcoming with so much about her family, herself and what has gone on and is going on with Christian’s leukemia. What a cross to bear for Christian and his whole family. I thank God for the time I spent with my children when they were small…uninterrupted with such horror. I cannot imagine the trial, the strength, and all the GOODNESS that erupts from this type of life event. Time for all of us to refocus on what is important and forget about all the other incidentals of life that provide us with only temporary highs. I know that some of my “firsts” may seem like temporary highs. That’s what you’re probably thinking (if anyone is reading this at all). But please try to understand that the “means” may be deceiving to what the “end” will produce…provided there is an end at all!

Anyway, the four of us continued to share. It was quite amazing communicating in our physical presence, especially when I don’t often talk to Amy and Christian. I shared with them about trying to get my mom (and me) to be more positive by creating our own “thankful for” list. There was just so much that we talked about, but I can’t tell you enough how wonderfully enjoyable and SIMPLE it was! GIMME more of this!!!

And one last thing…I left my mom’s and was just about pulling out of her street when I remembered I NEEDED a picture of this day for my blog and just to HAVE for the memory. I backed my car up like a mad woman down the street and up her driveway. I got us all back in the house and the phone camera did the rest! Posterity, here you are!

Day 10 ~ The Question Kid

Day 10

Jan 10, 2014

My first: I went to Mel's "It Works" party with Robin, my daughter

It was Friday night and after a LONG day of hard work cleaning two houses non-stop, I was ready to sit on the couch and REST. I had promised Mel that I would go to her "It Works" party and I am a woman of my word...at least that's what I always strive to be. So I hurried to get ready, picked up Robin and her son Tyler and headed off to Mel's house. 

Mel had a relatively good turnout after thinking that no one would show up. The business is quite interesting, dealing with better health inside and out. A gal named Bonnie who is "successful" in the business showed up later and added quite a bit to the intrigue of the business. I asked a LOT of questions perhaps because of my age (thus experience) with this type of tier marketing. I felt empowered with my delving questions, but I did not feel that I was skeptical and annoying. Actually, I feel that I was a bit entertaining. Go figure!

I will research this business and its products to find out if it is a fit for me and something that I want to do without becoming obsessed. I love feeling passionate but NOT obsessed. Obsession usually spirals downward...at least for me. I guess that is why I want to educate myself before I start selling. Makes sense to me and isn't that the way it should be, after all?

Day 9 ~ Just Craig and Me

Day 9

Jan 9, 2014

My first: I posted something on Craig's List

For the first time tonight I posted something to sell on Craig's List. I posted not just one but 4 items!  I am a sellin' fool! I've got to get ready to make room in my house for the renovation of my master suite! I will be changing two bedrooms into one big bedroom with a bathroom and a walk-in closet! My son Kyle will be the contractor of choice and I will be his assistant. I hope I learn a lot so I can do this kind of remodeling some more!

It was a trying time posting this stuff, not because of Craig's List, but because of my phone not being able to import my pictures. Crazy, but I got it and I have 4 items posted with more to come! Technological Mary, you have been updated once more!

Day 8 ~ Elvis is in the House

Day 8

Jan 8, 2014

My first: I created two Elvis impersonators.

I babysat Connor and Aidan tonight, my sister's two boys.  On the way to Karen's house, I called 911 because a motorist (a black lady) was changing her tire on Frank Scott Parkway and it was very dangerous (on the driver's side). I thought she should be protected by a police officer. I guess this was a first for me too. Today was the 2nd day in a row that I helped a woman in need out on the road. I would have stopped, but I had to get to Karen's to watch the boys so she could leave to go do her thing.

Because it was Elvis' 79th birthday, I got Aidan and Connor in the spirit by dressing them up as Elvis, sideburns and all. They performed "You Ain't Nothin' but a Hound Dog". After looking up and reading the lyrics to this song, I REALLY don't get it. But the boys had fun showing off their "talent". I wish I would have thought to put sideburns on myself and sing along with a guitar. That would have made it a much more authentic FIRST! The next time I do something creative with kids, I will be in on the creation as one of the "subjects" as well!

Day 7 ~ Thankful for...

Day 7

Jan 7, 2014 

My first: My mom and I are starting our “thankful for “list.

Today started out with my helping a young woman out of a snow drift that she slid into due to her low-tread tires. I grabbed the shovel she was using and continued removing the snow from under her car. Another lady stopped by with kitty litter that I put under the front tires. A man stopped by and provided the finishing touches to get this woman on her way to pick up her kids!

I proceeded to my son’s house to watch my grandkids, Abbey and Andy. Andy had a cough so their parents wanted me there to insure he was okay and, in case of an emergency, do what was necessary. My little Abbey pulled her first tooth all by herself with my prodding. I was right there to witness her last “successful” pull. She put it in a bowl of water to show her mom when she got home.

Then, I went over to my mom’s after my day of babysitting to shovel out her driveway. To my surprise and delight, her neighbor, Andy, had already snow-blew it.  Mom and I chatted for quite a while and I think we were almost going to duke it out because of her being so negative. I told her she drives me crazy with her always talking negative about people and life. Finally, I went to the kitchen and started a paper entitled “All the Things I’m Thankful For”. I wrote down the first two things she dictated to me that she was thankful for. The rest is up to her. We agreed that we would both work on our “thankful for” list and SHARE what we came up with when I came over next time to take down her Christmas tree. I asked her to be specific. I tried to convince her that doing this would help her to enjoy life more by thinking positive and being thankful. I encouraged her to try to do different things; her life is HERS now; just go for it despite her age. Ya think she’ll take my advice?

Day 6 ~ Love Letter

Day 6

Jan 6, 2014 

My first: I wrote a handwritten letter to Todd, my son, and mailed it, the old-fashioned way.

Boy, writing a 6-page letter in 1 hour and 5 minutes is being in the FLOW! It felt good to “talk” to Todd. I had a lot to share. It was kind of like he was here and listening to and caring about what I had to say. Honestly, when a parent gets older, it seems our lives just aren't as interesting anymore. Youth is “where it’s at” as far as topics of conversation go.  That’s okay though…not complaining. Each of us gets/will get our turn in both arenas, me included.

The weird thing about this is that I have no record of this letter once it is sent. I did not scan it. Below is a photo of the 6 pages, but that won’t tell you much.  I inserted a photo of our 2013 Christmas and that’s about it. It’s all yours, Todd, from my heart to yours. 

Day 5 ~ Snowy Stroll

Day 5

Jan 5, 2014 

My first: I took a walk in a blizzard (actually two). 

It was a cold blustery day with a blowing snow that was relentless. I even shoveled my driveway 3 times! I, of course, had my camera in tow and took quite a few shots of this reminder that maybe global warming isn’t such a threat after all!  It was biting cold and my face was beginning to feel numb. It was even hard to form words. After a while though, my face began to feel warmer and not so frozen…go figure.  To witness this "first”,  I had a guy on a 4-wheeler (with frozen eye lashes) take two photos of me.  I made a guardian snow angel in my front yard for the first time. I even took a bit of a drive that tested my fear. I wasn’t so much afraid of slippin’ and slidin’ as I was of getting just plain stuck.  I love this kind of day that you are at the mercy of Mother Nature. I think it tends to humble us all a bit and maybe even make us feel a little more like family. After all, we are all in this together. 

Day 4 ~ Social Non-Drinker

Day 4

Jan 4, 2014 

My first: I did not drink in a social setting. 

I spent 10 hours at Marsha's house with her girlfriend Donna, Kelly, and Judi. We went over for a brunch of Swedish pancakes and ended up staying well into the evening for salad and pizza. I had an utterly “revealing” time about myself because I realized I was having a blast while not drinking. Everyone (who knows me) I tell that I am not drinking in 2014 has a hard time believing it because I AM such a social drinker…a waste of 40 years, I might add. Other people there drank, but I was not even tempted. I did not crave or miss it. It was amazing and a great time. I was conversational the whole time and I remember everything! I am definitely looking forward to more of this kind of fun! It was interesting watching the transformation of one of the gals as she got drunk…kind of like looking in that ever-evasive mirror. 

Day 3 ~ 4-Wheeler Fun

Day 3

Jan 3, 2014 

My first: I drove a 4-wheeler

Today was a day full of firsts, but I am declaring my ride on my son's 4-wheeler as my "first" for the day! I was at his house and Shaundra, my daughter-in-law, offered me and Robin, my daughter, a drink. I declined because I am “enjoying” a YEAR with no alcohol. Kyle, my son, came home with his buddy. They were going to head outside to ride the 4-wheeler. I, with my new vocation this year of doing a “first” everyday, said that I would join them. And I did! Tyler, my grandson, joined me on the rubber mat on the back of the ATV for a wild ride until the chain got wrapped around the axle. Then it was my turn to take the driver’s seat. I made several rounds around my son’s yard alone and then with Tyler and then Abbey, my granddaughter.  The anomaly about this event was that I “normally” would have stayed inside, drank and "witnessed" from the deck all the fun below. NO MORE! Which Grandma do you think my grandkids will remember?

The other "firsts" I took on today was offering to help in a cabaret production. I spoke with Liz Murphy, a cabaret performer, for a titillating hour about entertaining, psychology, creativity, teaching, TED, etc. I am looking forward to her call. She will be doing a cabaret in Illinois and I will push to be a part of it!

Two simply easy ones were talking to a black gentleman (instead of escaping into the book I was reading) in the waiting room at Rowan's Tire while my car was getting its oil changed and tires rotated and then taking a ride with the mechanic to listen to my car's engine...never done that before. 

I visited with Thelma this afternoon for quite a while, sharing with her all that I am excited and passionate about for 2014 and all the changes I will be (and am) making! She is so wonderful to talk to and so accepting and non-judgmental! I really do love her! I showed her my photo with the mirror reflecting the frame and the quote "Mirrors are perfect for redirecting our relentless eyes of resentment". I explained what it meant and that we all do it ~ judge and resent. She said she doesn't because she knows what it's like to be on the other end, being judged. I believe her!